The Will To SucceedReaching and reachingBut never succeedingContemplating deathWithout grievingEvery mistake is feltBy a hard life dealtHallowed echoesHidden in stealthThe day after tomorrowSoon dripping in sorrowWith my fear of livingI dare not wallowStraight as an arrowEye sight is narrowWith direct speedI am now hollowI bid you all farewellBut try not to dwellI won’t be backI will not fail
Double TakeHe staresAt everyone elseBut meJust a little too longAnd it’s in that realizationThat I go breathless
To Sleep Or DieI would wake up ready to sleep or die.I desired substance.I desired conversation.I was receiving neither.There was whereI was suffocating the most.There between the nothingAnd the never.I would curl up with my painAnd drown in my thoughts.They had no titlesAnd when asked to describe themI could not recount where they came from.I could only stammer through complaintsAnd regrets.
I Went To SleepI went to sleep dreamingAbout rug burned kneesAnd menstruation bloodDried to my thighs.I went to sleep listeningTo the lulls of Jet,My heart,And my humidifier.I went to sleep thinkingHow can someone so dullThrive with someone so magneticAnd angry.I went to sleepAnd woke upStill angryAnd you were still dull.
Boy, Five, Went To Church TodayGod is dead.God gave his body to meSo that I could be something.Be a robot;A killing machine.Jesus Christ is dead too.
Online DatingYou're the sweetest thing that's never been mine.You're a truth I won't dare leave behind.I can't falsify these feelings inside.I can't help but watch the time.You're a knot in my thread.I'm a bump to your head.You'll willingly take my hand to be led.I'll whisper love letters while forgetting what was said.You'll wreck my sleep while I'll torture your dreams.We'll meet in the middle and discuss what that means.You'll talk of us finally becoming a "team."My questions will become boring, "Do you prefer caramel or creme?"Days will go by while our advances stay silent.You'll claim my problems were massive, too giant.I'll jump on you with a rebuttal for not being reliant.This crush was just far too defiant.
PressedPlease, don't be surprisedWhen you learn the skyIsn't only blue.It's ever changing just like you.Pressed between the pagesOf a book I once read;You are a rose I adoredBut should have never picked insteadWhen you place your lipsTo something steadyDoes it make you regretWhen I told you I wasn't ready?Because I went the moon and back for youAnd I left all my character flaws at the door.I thought showing you me would makes it seem too soonBut all I ever really wanted was something more.Anything more of youWould have never been too soon.
Nine-TenthsPossession is nine-tenths of the law.My possession went above that call.It was binding,It was blinding,And there was no compromise.It was restless,It was ruthless,And I was mesmerized.I flirted with boys and the idea of death.I peered over books and lifted my dress.Caressing those that took pity on me.Cherishing those that claim not to see.I slept little but danced often.I daydreamed of you inside my coffin.From my bed I decided to leave.Chasing a vision of what I might need.I rose, I walked.I fled, I stopped.In the snow at one a.m.I told myself I wouldn't do this again.An ice covered bench caught my eye.That's the place I decided to die.I laid, I waited.I shivered, I debated.Words rung throughout my ears.Whispers bright and vividly clear.Their spells were binding, blinding,And no need for compromise.Their spells were restless, ruthless,And I was fully mesmerized.The sun began a new day.There I knew I was okay.
BarePossessing the powerTo walk amongst the wavesOr the windIs not a conscious effortBut that is neither hereNor thereWhat's important is thatIt's in my possessionAnd you're in my wayTo unsettle the steadyI'll come covered in clovesRevealing that I'm already (bare)